Supersize vs. Superskinny

Ok, this show is my latest weight loss show that I am in love with! It's a british show, and it is very blunt and to the point. It takes someone who is morbidly obese, and someone who is borderline anorexic, and they swap diets. (They go through thorough medical tests to make sure they are both up to it before starting.) They only do that for a week, and then they leave "The Feeding Clinic" and are on their own for 3 months, armed with their diet plans from the on site dietitian. They come back after the 3 months to evaluate their progress.
I enjoy this, because it teaches the bigger person to have some control, and the smaller one to let go of some of their control, so that they can enjoy their life again. It's really great! I watch it on youtube after my hubby has gone to work! ;) Give it a try! It helps keep me motivated to keep going the right direction!

I am setting a personal goal!

So, I have decided to put this goal on my physical blog, because it will make me much more accountable to myself, and I also have someone other than my husband, (who is so supportive of me) to have to show my progress to.
I AM GOING TO LOSE 50 LBS THIS YEAR!! I AM GOING TO LOSE AT LEAST 1 LB A WEEK TO REACH THIS GOAL! I WILL WEIGH 160 BY THE LATEST OF NEXT SUMMER!
There! I have said it, and now I am accountable for it! Any help to get me to these goals will be super helpful! Please leave comments or start following me, so that I know I am not alone.
That has been the hardest part of this journey for me. I know my husband is there for me, and I know my family is there for me, but they have lives, and can't be with me all the time. Having this blog is really a way for me to always be accountable for the decisions I make. I am sure someone is reading this that I don't even really know, but I would love to know who you are! I know it will help me reach my goal that much faster!
I love all of the readers that have either left a comment for me, or have talked with me in person. I think of you all often, and that really helps motivate me!

Slim and Sassy Challenge

So, at the Curves I work at, a lot of the ladies have been having success with the Slim and Sassy essential oil. Here's the definition of what it does from the company that makes it, doTerra.
dōTERRA®'s Slim & Sassy® Metabolic Blend is a proprietary formula of 100% pure CPTG Certified Pure Therapeutic Grade® essential oils designed to help manage appetite between meals. Slim & Sassy includes a blend of grapefruit, lemon, peppermint, ginger, and cinnamon essential oils. Just add 8 drops to 16 oz. of water (regular size bottle of water) and drink between your healthy meals throughout the day to help manage hunger, calm your stomach, and lift your mood. For aromatic, topical, and internal use.
So, my boss has given me a 2 week challenge to see if it works for me. I don't meet with the dietitian until next week, so I should be able to give it a fair go. For me, I really don't like the taste of it, so they told me to mask it with the Lime essential oil. It kind of just gives everything a more bland taste, but it mellows out the "just brushed my teeth" feeling. I can also use it topically, so I think that's the route that I will really go! ;)
So, we will see if this curbs my appetite like everyone claims it does. I feel it probably works, because I've seen many of the ladies here love it! I tried it yesterday as the first day, so here we go! I will give a full report on July 11th!

It finally happened to me!

So, you know how you hear on TV shows about people my size not getting talked to in a department store? Well, that happened to me Friday night.
I was out shopping for myself, and I was so happy! I was fitting into clothes I didn't think I would fit into! (YAY!) I was on such a high, feeling like all of the hard work I have been putting into my workouts was actually paying off! So, I passed by a store I would normally not go into, and saw something that my cute sister in law would love. (Pink and lacey!) She is much smaller than I am, so I never thought it would be a problem.
As I entered the store, no one acknowledged that I came in. My first thought was, "Oh, they must all be helping customers and must not have noticed me come in." Well, to make a longer story short, I was in the store for 15 minutes, and even picked up and expensive pair of jeans for my husband, and no one talked to me at all.
The kicker? The associates talked to EVERYONE ELSE in the store, and I stood next to an associate for almost 5 minutes, and I still wasn't talked to. I was absolutely mortified, put back my clothes I had picked out, and walked out of the store.
I am proud of how I handled myself. Rather than running to the food court for something to eat like I would have done 2 years ago, I very calmly walked out of the mall, and went on my way for the night. I did not comfort eat! I called a friend, (because my hubby was already at work for the night,) and went and got distracted with them, and it still didn't involve food. I did post on Facebook about it to get some of those feelings off my chest, but I am feeling ok about it today. I did have a moment in my car where I shed a few tears about it. But now, I can move on with my life.
I will say that even when I do skinny up, I will never be shopping at that store. I'm not going to name the store, but I will let you know I have filed a complaint with their corporate office.

So, I've made my decision...

So, I keep getting the feeling that going to a dietitian is going to be my best course of action. I can't tell you exactly why. But, I want something a little more personally catered to me than anything I have found previously. I really feel that I will be able to stick with it. I've got the number of a local clinic here where I live, so I will call and see how much an appointment is, and will start from there.
On another note, I got talking with the gal that lives on the opposite corner from where we are, and she was talking about wanting to work out more, so I suggested we become walking buddies! She has similar goals to me, and we both have a long journey ahead of us! I really hope she takes me up on it!

Why can't I?

Ok, this picture is a man named James, who lost 313 lbs in a year's time. THAT IS PHENOMENAL! He did have a lot of help in the beginning with his fitness guru living with him for the first 3 months of this year to teach him everything he needed to do. But he also lost 90 lbs on his own after that, and that's a lot of weight in a 3 month period. If he can do that, why can't I lose 50 lbs in a year? Granted, I'm not 651 lbs to start, with that much weight to lose, but I don't think my goal is unrealistic. 1 lb a week is a very healthy pace to be losing weight. I'm not expecting instant results. I want them to be slow and steady so that I know I'm losing it the right way. Plus, I don't want the saggy skin thing that can go along with drastic weight loss, so if it comes off more slowly, I don't get that quite so much.
So, I've figured out what my main struggle is. I need a food game plan. I have these things that I roughly follow, (Weight Watchers, and a diet plan I got from a friend) but that doesn't seem to be enough for me. I'm considering setting up an appointment with a dietician a time or two to see what would be best suited for me. I want this to happen for me, so I need to learn what is best for me. That's the one thing about weight loss. We all need slightly different things. Yes, we all need a healthy diet and to exercise to lose weight, but our bodies adapt to different things. Am I crazy to be considering this?

Portion Control

Ok, so now that my hubby is working the graveyard shift, I am usually making dinner for 1, instead of 2. Having that chance is a double edged sword for me though. Some of the things I make at home, I don't know how to make it smaller than 2 portions, especially anything to do with pasta.
It is also more tempting to go out and grab something to eat, because it is just for me. I think about the dirty dishes that it would cause, and usually end up going out. This is obviously not the choice I want to truly be making, or I wouldn't be talking about it.
So, I need to get more motivation to be completely in control of what I am eating. Why is this such a struggle for me? I haven't been able to place why yet. Sadly, I think it is mostly coming down to 3 things.
1. I can get lazy. After working a long day, I just don't want to think about having to do one more thing, and when I don't have to, I usually wont on those days.
2. I'm scared that people will treat me different when I am skinnier. In a way, I want people to treat me different, but in the same instance, I don't want them to treat me different. I feel people give me quite a bit of respect now, and I fear losing that. I know this is stupid, but I think that is part of the reason why I just go out. I know it's not very good for me, so I am sabotaging my own mission of health and fitness.
3. It seems like they are always changing what your portion control should be/look like anymore! It starts to become a daunting task!
Well, I have found the most current answer!
50% of your plate should have your veggies. (Have fruit in a small bowl off to the side)
20% of your plate should have your grain/starch
30% of your plate should have your protein
So there you have it! I am going to work this week on cooking at home, and having the correct portion sizes on my plate. What are you going to work on?

I need to get a grip...

...on my eating habits. I was following a fabulous program for a while, and was seeing results, but since my surgery, and even a little before, i haven't been following anything at all. I need to tighten up the reins on it. I've been dabbling in what I can and can't handle since my gall bladder surgery. The only thing I've been able to really pinpoint is alfredo sauce, which is one of my favorite things to put on pasta. It's healthier for me that it isn't an option for me anymore, but it bums me out, and I have to find something else to put on pasta. I haven't found a red sauce that I like yet. They are always too chunky for me. My mom made one growing up that I like ok, but I'm usually trying to do 6 other things while I'm cooking, so throwing in making the sauce is harder for me. I might just have to make a huge batch and bottle it or something! ;)
So, if anyone has any ideas on how to help me tighten the reins on my eating habits, that would be super helpful! In the mean time, I think I will start following the most recent plan that has been working for me thanks to my friend Jeanna.

25 lbs down!

So, I have to tell you something. I am down 25 lbs down! I truly wish I had a picture of me at my peak weight, because I would love to do a side by side reveal, but alas, I cannot. I cannot express how excited I am that this journey is continuing the way it is! 2 years ago, I weighed 235 lbs.
When I started blogging, I was around 220, (even though in my picture I said I was 216, I gained 4 lbs back within the week. So I say I started at 220) So since I started the blog, I have lost 10 lbs, and I know that's a long time to wait for that weight loss, but I can guarantee, that it won't come back on me! I want to lose it the right way, and that means that it isn't going to come off speedily.
People in my life keep asking me what's different about me. I think it's mostly because I am confident, and I feel good about how my body feels now. Plus, my face is starting to thin out again, and that always makes me happy! ;)

101 POSTS!

I totally missed that yesterday's post was my 100th post! I can't believe I have been keeping up with this blog as well as I have. (My personal one with my husband hasn't hit 100 posts and I have had it much longer!) So, I thought I would share a recent picture. I have a long way to go before I reach my goal, but I am slowly getting there!
So, last night I watched an episode of Supersize vs. Superskinny. It was a very different show! It takes someone who doesn't eat enough, and someone who eats way to much, and they swap their diets for a week. Then they are put on their doctor recommended diet for 12 weeks to see how they did. It's an interesting concept. The overweight guy did really well and didn't cheat on his at all. But the girl couldn't eat everything in front of her. She couldn't relinquish her control of her food. I know what that is like to an extent. I am no where near as extreme, but I am a calorie counter, and I feel that if I go over what I think I should be eating, I get upset, and I binge. I don't purge anymore, but it hinders my weight loss journey. I'm getting better at not bingeing though.
Every day is a new day, and today is a good day so far! I will do my best to keep it that way!

What should I Weigh?

So, I was looking into what people think I should weight to be classified as "Healthy" and I was dumbfounded. They say I should weigh between 128-134 to be healthy. To be completely honest with you, that is heavier than I thought it would be. It seems that the last time I was told, I was supposed to be between 118-121. Personally, I think their choice is too thin for me.
Looking back on my life, I was happiest when I was around the 145 range. A lot of people think that is too fat, but I was really confident in myself at that weight. My stopping point on my weight calculator at the top of my blog is currently set to stop at 160, because that is where my doctor wants me to be before my hubby and I go full force into trying for a baby. The ultimate goal is to get back around 145, and be able to stay there for the majority of my life. Yes, I know I will gain weight back when I get pregnant, but I want to make my body as healthy as I can before trying for that sweet baby.
So, here's to a week with some weight loss! I weighed this morning, and I didn't gain over my lazy eating weekend, so that is something. I know I need to be better, and I will be, starting today! ;)

Healthy Eating

So, what I have come to realize through my journey so far, is that eating right is 80% of the success in weight loss. At least for me. Yes, you need to exercise. That is very crucial to having a healthy body. But most importantly, it is what you feed your body that encourages good health.
In my religious beliefs, there are also some guidelines on what we should eat. They encourage us to obstain from coffee, hot tea, tobacco, and alcohol. When you look at a lot of different diet plans, they discourage most of those things too. They also encourage us to eat meat sparingly, and eat seasonally. I love the summer months where I live, because that means I have fabulous tasting fruit! Watermelon is a favorite in our house.
As I have grown up, I have learned to love more vegetables. When I was a kid, I would only eat green beans. I would occasionally munch on corn on the cob, and I would eat a salad if I was "forced" to. (My parents were great parents, and always made me eat a couple of bites of any fruit or veggie on my plate.) Now, I love asparagus, spinach, salads, banana peppers, olives, carrots, and several others! Oh, I love yellow squash and zucchini over pasta! Yum! There are a couple of veggies I still detest because I don't like the texture in my mouth... onions, tomatoes, and broccoli. Blech! I use onion powder in my cooking so I still get that great onion flavor, and I like salsa, because the texture is different.
So, I'm putting this out there to remind myself how important it is to eat the best I can. I always feel better when I eat well!

Sleep

So I have been sleeping Really Well since I had my gall bladder out. I can't believe how much better I function when I get good sleep! It boggles my mind still! I chose this picture with my post today, because I would love to find a sleep mask like that! It's so adorable! That's one thing that I have heard can really help you get restful sleep. So, in the spirit of that today, I thought I would share this article from Dr. Oz on how to help yourself get better sleep!

This article can be found on the Dr. Oz Website under "Lose Weight Through Better Sleep"

1. Stick to 1 Sleep Schedule: The consistency of a regular sleep schedule allows your brain to know when it is time to sleep and when it is time to be awake. The more regular your schedule, the more likely you are to fall asleep and stay asleep. Remember, the longer you sleep, the more calorie-burning REM sleep you get.
Sleep Tip: Use your alarm to help you know when to go bed to get the right amount of quality sleep. Don’t use the snooze button to potentially interrupt those final minutes of REM sleep! Set your alarm in the morning for the last possible minute you need to be out of bed.
2. Stop Caffeine by 2 p.m.: Caffeine can be in your system up to 10 hours after you drink or eat it. Caffeine can not only prevent some people from falling asleep, but caffeine also keeps your brain out of the deeper more refreshing stages of sleep that you need for weight loss.
Sleep Tip: If you are feeling drowsy in the middle of the day, try my Nap-a-Latte™ technique: quickly drink a small cup of cool drip coffee, and then take a 25-minute nap. The Nap-a-Latte™ reduces your drowsiness and the caffeine will wake you up, but taken at the right time (before 2 p.m.) will not keep you awake at night.
3. Stop Alcohol 3 hours Before Bedtime: It takes about four hours for an average person to metabolize the average alcoholic beverage. Once metabolized, your body needs to urinate and this can disrupt sleep. Alcohol can certainly make you drowsy, but keeps you out of the deep stages of sleep you need for weight loss.
Sleep Tip: Try the “glass for a glass method.” Drink one glass of water for every alcoholic beverage you drink. And stop all alcohol 3 hours before your bedtime alarm goes off (Sleep Tip #1) .
4. Stop Exercise 4 Hours Before Bed: Research shows that raising your core body temperature a few hours before bed can help you fall asleep, and regular exercisers get more deep sleep where growth hormone is produced, which tells your body to burn fat.
Sleep Tip: Work out earlier in the evening and consider yoga, deep breathing, or stretching before bed.
5. Give the Sun a High Five Every Morning: Light resets your biological clock every day and sunlight is the best type of light there is! Getting 15 minutes of sunlight each morning keeps your sleep rhythm regular and works well to help burn those calories at night.
Sleep Tip: Have your breakfast outside in the morning, and get plenty of sunlight to help reset your internal biological clock.

A couple of other things that I have been including in my own routine is to turn my alarm clock away from me on the nightstand, because sometimes the light can effect how you sleep. I also don't keep my phone on my nightstand anymore. I keep it in my bedroom in case of an emergency, but I don't keep it next to me, so that when I get those middle of the night Facebook notifications, I am not woken up by them anymore. I am also always laying down at least 30 minutes before I really want to be asleep. It helps me make sure I'm getting enough sleep!

So, now that my husband is going to be working graves through the rest of the summer, I have to ensure that I am getting enough restful sleep! I hope this article helps someone!

Home Workouts

So, I feel a little limited on what I can do for home workouts right now. I think too much dancing would be bad because of all of the twisting, so it seems I only have walking. The problem with that, is that I get really bored walking most of the time, unless I have someone with me.

I also just found out my husband is going to be working mostly nights through the summer, so I've now lost my walking buddy. What are some of the things that you guys do? I have my T-tapp, but I'm scared to do that right now, because I don't want to strain any of the incisions for another week or so, but I want to do some workouts! I'm so frustrated! HELP!

Early Mornings

So, I work at Curves, and I work the early morning shift. 99% of me is not a morning person, so when I first took this job, it was difficult for me, but the money has really helped my hubby and I stay afloat. (This money will now be used as the money to pay my medical bills.)
Now, I love getting up in the morning and coming here to be with the ladies! Yes, it is still hard to get out of bed most mornings, but as soon as I am out of my bed, I look forward to coming to work, and spending time with wonderful women who help inspire me!

First Workout After Surgery

So, yesterday I did my first workout since I had my gall bladder out. It felt SO GOOD!!!! I can't even tell you how much better I feel knowing that my body is free from the toxic organ that was pulling me down. It can only get better from here! I have more energy, and I am sleeping better! My workout felt fabulous! There is a machine that I skipped, just because it has you twist from side to side, and I don't want to reopen any of the incisions! It just feels good to know that I won't feel flabby for much longer! ;)

I Finally Weighed.....

So, I hadn't weighed since my surgery until today, and I didn't gain anything! Wahoo! I was so nervous where I couldn't work out that I was going to gain at least 5 lbs! I didn't gain a thing! now that I am all cleared to work out again, I should be able to continue on my path to losing!
I know that the way I ate after the surgery had a lot to do with my weight staying the same rather than gaining. I have found my love of water again, and I feel good again! I'm so excited to see the results that are to come now that I feel good again!

These Sound Tasty!

Healthy Snickerdoodle Recipe

Ingredients

1.5c all purpose flour
1.5c whole wheat flour
1c light butter
1.5c Splenda granular
0.25c Splenda granular (for rolling dough)
1tbsp baking powder
1tsp baking soda
.5c egg substitute
1tbsp vanilla
1tbsp ground cinnamon (for rolling dough)

Directions

1) Preheat oven to 375 degrees

2) Combine flour, 1.5c Splenda, baking powder and baking soda in one bowl

3) In another bowl, combine margarine, egg and vanilla extract mixing well with a wire whisk

4) Add liquid ingredients to the dry ingredients and mix gently to combine

5) In a smaller bowl, combine the remaining 4 tablespoons Splenda and cinnamon

6) Shape dough into 1" balls and roll each ball in cinnamon mixture

7) Place cookies on cookie sheets (parchment paper) and flatten each with the bottom of a glass dipped in flour

8) Bake for 5-7 minutes

9) Cool on wire racks

makes 3 dozen cookies

adapted from Splenda cookbooklet

Number of Servings: 36

I'm going to try these out probably tonight! I will let you know if they are as tasty as they sound!

Follow Up Appointment

So, yesterday was my follow up appointment with the surgeon! Everything is all good, and I am so happy that they told me I can work out again! I'm so excited! I just can't do any heavy lifting, so I will have to take it easy on the Curves machines. But, ZUMBA IS A MUST! I'm so sick of feeling the flab come back from being inactive for a week and a half! It's workout time!

Surgery

5/23/11
So, I need to apologize in advance for how long this post is going to be, but I feel I need to share my adventures of this past week.
Saturday night, we had stopped by a BBQ for some friends, and then we met up with some other friends at Jack and Jill's Bowling in American Fork. They have the best french fries in existance! So, Caleb and I ordered some and split it, because I hadn't been eating as much greasy food lately. Shortly after eating them, I started to feel some pain. It started out dull, but as the night went on and we started watching a movie, the pain woulldn't go away. Since we were in American Fork already, I stopped by my parents house to ask my dad for a blessing.
After the blessing, I kept having the feeling that I would need to go to the hospital. For those of you who don't know, we don't have medical insurance, so on the whole drive there, I kept thinking "How on earth are we going to pay for this?"
We were admitted to the ER quickly, and got into my room. I had a fabulous doctor, who had acutally admitted my dad to the hospital once. As Dr. Shelton started to poke my stomach to see if there was isolated pain anywhere, he poked up near my right rib, and I yelped out in pain I had never felt in my life. He sent me in for an ultra sound, ("Oh no! More Money!" was my first thought.) and was dizzily wheeled over for it. When they turned on the sound, I was almost hoping to hear a little extra heart beat with mine, but there wasn't one.
Once my results came in, Dr. Shelton informed me that I had gall bladder disease. I started crying I was so emotional. He also told me they would be admitting me to the hospital. (CRAP!! These bills are really going to be high.) I stayed at the hospital with my mom, while Caleb and my dad went to the Ellison house to sleep. I was calling people about it by 6am, and had been slowly letting everyone know via Facebook, that I would most likely be looking at surgery. The surgeon called me about 8am, talking to me about my options.
My gall bladder needed to come out either way, it was just a matter of when. I kept thinking and feeling like the sooner the better, because I don't want to have to pay for an extra day in the hospital. I went in for surgery around 9am, and was back in my room about 11am. I had some great friends stop by, and I was trying to get some more sleep, but this machine kept beeping at me, saying I wasn't breathing deep enough. I was being checked out of the hospital by 3pm, and as soon as I got to my parents bed, I was out until 6:30. It was just so nice to sleep. Caleb was able to run home and grab us some clothes so that we could stay at my parents house for that first night.
I really have felt better since they removed my gall bladder, and it's just my surgery scars that hurt now. I won't be back to work until Monday, so it's a mandatory vacation, because I need to heal. I am so grateful for my bosses and my employees who are picking up the slack while I am gone.
I also need to give the biggest shout out to my mom, who has been by my side through all of this, along with my husband. I am so blessed to have such a caring family, who is helping me heal and get better. My favorite thing about today was that I got to finally shower! It felt so good!
6/1/11
Recovery has been hard for me. I am a very independent creature by nature, so having to so completely rely on someone has been hard for me. I can't lift anything heavier than a milk jug for the next 5 weeks, which also means that I can't do my Curves workout now that I am back to work! I am going nuts! I feel myself getting fatter, because I haven't been active. I haven't been eating too terribly, because I don't want to upset my stomach, so I have been trying to stay low fat as the doctor has ordered, but also trying to keep my portion sizes small, but enough that I am filling myself. I feel like my stomach a shrunk since surgery. I'm just not nearly as hungry as I was before.
The great thing is that because I have babied myself until yesterday, I don't really hurt anymore! :) I only hurt when I have been sitting a long time, and my pants have pushed on my belly button, then it will twinge a little, but nothing severe.
I am a lucky and blessed person to be recovering as well as I have! We will see what my surgeon says today when I go to see him!